Refusing to Settle

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How do you crack the code to wealth and live rich for a lifetime? Does this sound like an infomercial already? Going over that with 10 BEST ideas from “The Millionaire Fastlane” — It’s Clark from Refusing to Settle dot com — let’s go! Love this book - kind of… more like love-hate. Which is the vibe I get from MJ DeMarco. He’s kinda like the older uncle you never had. One thing I know is that he says 100% of what he means w/o sugar coating and that’s refreshing! One thing I will say, if you agree that the “slow lane” is bad (i.e. work for 40years then retire, get rich slow, etc) then skip the first 2/3 of the book. The whole first 200+ pages are just changing your beliefs about money, business, and life timelines.

Get rich QUICK! This DOES exist! The basketball player who signs the 30M contract. The artist who’s song tops billboard and cashes in The entrepreneur who sells his company and is worth $2M overnight. Get rich QUICK does exist - and it’s worth pursuing. Get rich EASY does NOT exist! Can’t take shortcuts because there are none.


3. The Slow lane

4. CAN’T HAVE IT BOTH WAYS! They WANT passive income…. without working They WANT a business…. without a product They WANT comfort now… AND brilliantly successful business they never had to sacrifice for. Kind of like that story about baker “who will help me bake the cake?”

5. N: NEED - don’t do what you love. Fill a demand. HEALTH - WEALTH - RELATIONSHIPS Sell them what they want, GIVE them what they need!

6. E: ENTRY E: ENTRY - if anyone can start your business, probably not best to be in. (Ie. MLM, Network Marketing, life coach, etc). In a gold rush, done dig for gold, sell shovels!

7. X…? C: CONTROL if you’re not driving, who is? Responsibility 100%. Control every aspect of the company. Don’t crash. Don’t hitchhike, drive.

8. T: TIME passive income 24/7 vs an active 40hrs week. Can you detach yourself from business? If you can’t, you have a job.

9. EDUCATE slow laners need credentials to keep learning. Fast lanes constantly invest into mind. Need to get good at pulling out a wallet and paying.

stop settling start living


Direct download: 10_BEST_IDEAS_The_Millionaire_Fastlane_MJ_Demarco_Book_Summary.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:00pm PST

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How to Get Over Your Ex | 3 Pieces of Breakup Advice In this video, we're talking about how to get over your ex and why it’s so dang hard in the first place… Give you the summary of the question: "A Bit of a different topic but I’m in the middle of a breakup (long story) and having a hard time getting over them. Any advice on how to get over a relationship, ex, breakup, etc?" Look relationships have our biggest pleasure AND biggest pain. On TOP of the world when they’re going great. Gates of hell broke open when it’s bad. SO many of our needs are there right? Need for significance, certainty, connection, love, security, etc. Let’s talk about how to get OUT of one. How to move on from ex. How to deal with ex-girlfriends or ex-boyfriends in the past. Hopefully, this helps reframe things for you slightly. I like to think about this: There are THREE uses of your past.

1. DON’t: regret it i.e. talking to a friend once about HOW MUCH TIME HE WASTED on this girl. He started going on and on about what a waste, opportunity costs, ditching friends, traveling in Peru, etc. Don’t do this. The ONLY regret is that you stayed in it too long. Some people we grow up with, others we grow out of. POINT of relationship is to GROW more TOGETHER than you could alone. It’s OKAY to grow out of them. Doesn’t mean it’s easy, just means it’s okay.

2. DON’T: romanticize it ONLY think about good times — like some rom com or Episode of Bachelor where they picnic on top of a volcano in New Zealand…. Don’t forget about the hair around the sink. Don’t forget about the psychotic break out fights throwing dishes. Don’t forget how they put you down in past for dreams and aspirations. Make a list: ALL The reasons it’s a GOOD thing you’re not together anymore. i.e. Hardest time getting over ex-someone I barely dated, and it was back in high school. Got cut short 4 months. REASON it was SO hard was because this was BEFORE honeymoon phase ended! Couldn’t get to the “Real stuff” so it was ALL blissful. Not true.

3. DO: use it What did this person teach me about love? What did this person teach me about myself? What did this person teach me about what I want in a partner? What did this person teach me about what I DON’T want in a partner? How did I grow with this person? DON’T — LOSS, LESS, NEVER i.e. let’s hypothetically say you had a terrible ex, manipulative, etc — NOW you know exactly what to look for (avoid) in a future partner. MAYBE that ex saved you from marrying some psycho. OR saved you from dating crazier chick!

stop settling start living


Direct download: How_to_Get_Over_Your_Ex_3_Pieces_of_Breakup_Advice.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:00pm PST

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How to Win Friends and Influence People |10 Best Ideas | Dale Carnegie | Book Summary (Part III) The Most successful leaders all have one thing in common: They’ve read “How to Win Friends and Influence People” Today’s book summary and book review: How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie (PART III)

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This book will rock your communication. Dale Carnegie's classic public speaking and interpersonal communication book, how to win friends and influence people is packed full of actionable ideas and take aways. You might also consider getting the full book for this – it’s killer! We’ve done TWO previous book summaries on this book! Definitely frequently requested. AWESOME concepts in here about communication. Second one had a sick mustache… I want to bring that back but my girlfriend literally said she’d break up with me.

1. SAY MY NAME “Remember a person’s name is the sweetest sound” Names carry (AGE) years of meaning. Identity acknowledgment i.e. Even dogs know their names!

8. Get The Other Person Saying “Yes, Yes” Immediately EX: Psychology - we’re more likely to say yes to bigger task if said yes to smaller one first. 9. Talk in Terms of The Other Person’s Interests. Here’s why most life coaches suck and will never make any money: THEY VIOLATE RULE NUMBER FOUR! They ONLY want to talk about themselves! They expect people to pay them for them to talk about them…. WIIFM = most powerful tool I’ve used. (how I start these videos). All sales and marketing does this! i.e. someone’s about page on their blog…. is it about them or about you?

10. Talk About Your Own Mistakes Before Criticizing The Other Person. Call Attention to People’s Mistakes Indirectly. How do you give negative feedback without sounding like a jerk? or asshole?

6. Become Genuinely Interested In Other People "You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.” -Dale Carnegie

7. Let The Other Person Feel That The Idea is His or Hers. It's amazing what you can accomplish if you don't care who gets the credit for it. TIP: NEVER tell someone “you're wrong” — puts defenses up. Ego gets in way.

5. Give Honest and Sincere Appreciation Flattery is of the tongue, appreciation is of the heart. TIP: Honest and sincere doesn't mean BIG and massive. Simple, “Hey, you’re a really solid speaker. Room lit up when you said that joke about the museum” or “I really love how authentic you are when speaking to others.”

3. TIP: NEVER put people down! They will come back with a vengeance. i.e. “people to kill list in Billy Madison” “Even if you win… you still lose” Are you arguing for your cause or for your ego?

2. Use humor LEAST offensive or risky humor are jokes about yourself!

stop settling start living


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Today I’m giving you my 5 BEST tips on how to interview someone. Wanted to start you own podcast and interview guests, just want an interesting conversation with someone, learn how to be a good host - stick around. clark from refusing to settle dot com. Let’s go! QUESTION: “Hello Refusers, I’m going to interview my first guest on my podcast this weekend. I would love to hear your advice and experience of hosting a podcast.” - Erwin Kwun I feel bad because NO ONE answered this. AND it’s an awesome question….


I ran PaleoHacks Podcast for 3-years - did over 100 shows with NYT best selling authors, bloggers, scientists, etc. I ran RTS // DWML // DWMH podcast before. Mostly from my dorm room in my boxers…

1. DO YOUR RESEARCH Nothing worse than being a guest and the host doesn’t know your story! Become OBSESSED with them. I had 4-pages of notes. BONUS: Research your favorite podcasts. How do hosts structure show? Questions? “Their Story” always toss up in first 5-min… “How did you get into all this?” for small guests is great. For BIG guests always start with a statement: “So you were a successful personal trainer in London, take me to the day where you walked out on your job….” Give them a head start on their story - they finish if they want.

2. to small talk or not to small talk? I had show with dude who HATED small talk — SO rude! I had guests who wanted to talk for 20-min BEFORE the interview. In general: Be brief and concise. BIGGER the guest the LESS time they have for an off-air talk. DO NOT keep your host after/ask them personal questions. MAYBE one or two.

3. What have they never said? Neil Strauss talks about this. What have they never said? Never spoke about before? Goal is to tap into PASSION Ask the question: “What are you most excited about in ________?”

4. Be present NOTHING worse than guest doing some big 10-minute rant and you’re holding on to the joke from the first minute waiting for a clever moment to sneak it in. BE PRESENT! In the moment with them. Let it fffflllloooowwwww If you do switch gears, SEGWAY! “Wow, so much good content we could keep talking about this for hours. But I really wanted to touch on ______”

5. Logistics Confirm and remind your guest! If they don’t show up… it’s YOUR fault, not theirs! Send confirmation 5-days before and 1-day before Let them know who’s igniting the call and where it will be head Some guests like Q’s ahead of time. ASK TIP: Before call check in 45min okay with the schedule? This is pre-recorded we like to keep it as casual as possible but if you need to stop or edit something out you get final cut of whatever’s in here. Just let me know.

stop settling start living


Direct download: How_to_Podcast_-_5_Tips_To_Make_Guests_and_Fans_LOVE_You.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:00pm PST